Without Her
by Skye
Summary: Musa reminisces on what's been lost. Musa/Tecna


_Notes: This pairing is first love for Winx shoujo ai, and I'm happy I actually finished a fic for them, heh. Takes place after the season 3 episode where Tecna gets her Enchantix. Based off the 4Kids dub, because I prefer the 4Kids version of Musa, and pretty much everyone except Tecna. So this Tecna is somewhat of a hybrid of the two, using information only known in that other dub._

**Without Her**

It seemed wrong to Musa that Bloom would be the most remembered out of all of them in their accomplishments. Already she was held above the rest of them whenever the group was mentioned in the school or during public speeches about the group. There was no denying that she had an interesting story, and was the most powerful of the group. But power wasn't everything, especially inborn power that hadn't been earned. Musa herself studied harder and got better grades than Bloom, and there were a host of other things that held Flora and even Stella above the girl. Not to mention...

"Musa, are you alright?" Bloom asked, breaking the silence as they walked down the hall.

"With all that power, why didn't you do anything?" Musa snapped at Bloom.

"Musa-" Layla began.

"Bloom's just as upset as you are! We all are. Why don't you just leave her alone!" Stella said, sticking up for Bloom as always.

"Bloom's not the one who's dead, buried in the middle of some weird interdimensional trench right now," Musa said.

"Musa, I know you're upset, but you have to remember, we all make our own choices-" Flora began.

"And Bloom chose to let her die! And you!" Musa pointed towards Layla. "It was for your realm, why didn't you do anything!" she demanded.

"Ah- I- I just- I-" Layla stuttered.

"Forget it, I'm out of here," Musa said, running ahead of the group as they stared sorrowfully after her.

Layla burst into tears as Musa ran farther away. Flora rushed to comfort her. "She doesn't mean it, she's just mourning. Everyone reacts differently, but I know Musa doesn't mean what she's saying," Flora assured.

"She's right, though. I should have done something. It shouldn't have happened this way. How embarrassing it is that Tecna had to fight for me."

"She just saw an opportunity, and jumped right in. That's Tecna for you," Bloom said bitterly.

"And we all agreed to help you, Layla," Stella said.

"That's right. Don't put it on yourself, sweetie," Flora assured.

Ahead of the group, Musa heard the general mumbling of her friends, but not the words. She really didn't care what they were saying, either. The only thought in her mind was her loss. No, it wasn't just her loss, it was the loss of all magical realms. Though nobody outside their group seemed to know, Tecna was the real backbone of the self named Winx Club, despite Bloom's power. Yes, it took more than power. There were many other things that made a hero, on the top of the list being bravery and selflessness. Though ultimately, that was what ended up taking Tecna from them so early.

And though Stella claimed to be just as upset as her, there's no way she could be. Stella was troubled, a near failure, but confident and self-assured, before becoming meeting their group. For Musa, it was different. Years of her family's grief had oppressed her. The fact she had to hide her love and her studies of music from her father made her defensive, secretive, and emotionally closed to the rest of the world. If it had been anyone else except Tecna that had been her roommate, Musa wasn't sure that she'd have made it in Alfea.

Musa remembered, now slowing to a walk, how Tecna had first contacted her. "Who is this?" Musa had asked when she first heard Tecna's then unfamiliar voice on the phone, saying about how good it was to get a hold of her. She had heard before from other students that Alfea liked to have royalty room together with non-royalty, and much preferred that situation to being stuck with some pampered brat, but hadn't given much thought to her roommate other than that.

"Oh, I'm sorry. My name is Tecna. It turns out I'm going to be your roommate. I don't know if it's custom, but I decided to contact you and get to know you before we met in Alfea. I'm not sure if I can make it on the move-in date. Maybe I can, but I have some issues I might not be able to take care of before then. We'll meet in person soon enough, but I thought it might be polite to talk before then."

"Uh huh," Musa had said. At the time, she hadn't even started packing.

"Well, this isn't the best medium for me to have a conversation. I had to find a special phone to dial out to your realm. But you do have access to the realm wide web?"

"Yeah," Musa had said, noting to herself the little used computer in the corner.

"I can meet you there... Well, I'm not sure you can enter it the same way I do, but there are many other options. Video communication, audio such as this, and even text communication," Tecna informed.

"Text is fine for me," Musa said. School hadn't started yet, and she'd prefer not having to fake enthusiasm before then.

"A bit rudimentary, but it will work better for me," Tecna said.

They exchanged information, and were soon chatting away through machines. Musa was cold at first, only reading message after message sent from from the strange girl. She was an android, and that was how she was able to put out text so fast, she had explained. Musa soon found herself sharing a little with the near stranger as Tecna chatted away, including her love of music, though not how she had to hide it.

When Musa and Tecna finally moved in the dorm together, Musa felt totally comfortable. Even the other currently present suite sharer, a hippie-like chick who brought in pot after pot of flowers of all things, Musa was able to relax and talk to them. When nighttime came, Tecna began to explain every gadget she'd brought. "Why do you have to tell me this much?" Musa had finally asked.

"Well, I just want to make sure you're comfortable around me. I know I'm different, and-"

"With everything you were saying to me online, I was picturing you as some kind of metal-skinned robot with wires exposed and noisy joints. You're an android, yeah. It won't matter unless you want it to. And for goodness sake, you're human enough, you're freaking gorgeous."

After finishing, Musa had seen a smile flutter across Tecna's face, another very human trait. "I suppose you're right," she said. "And by the way, even though I've said so much about myself, I have noticed that you haven't said anything about your music since you got here. People love music. Why not just, well, let them know that you're that kind of artist? I'm sure they'd be interested."

Musa frowned. "Actually, ever since my mom died, my dad's kind of banned music from our house. So I can't really let anyone know that I-"

"Oh, and you're worried about that?" Tecna interrupted, then immediately corrected herself. "I don't mean that in a disparaging way, of course. I know it can be troubling to have a parental figure disapprove of you, but you know, he's not here! You're free! You can be the kind of person you want to be. Within reason, that is. And I'm fairly sure you wanting to share your music would be within Alfea guidelines, in the right setting of course."

"Alright, I get it," Musa had said, sounding annoyed, but smiling, as if she was feeling a weight lifting off of her just thinking of the possibilities.

Tecna had smiled then, placing her hand on top of Musa's. "Like you said, it won't matter unless you want it to."

Musa had then taken Tecna's advice, letting her true self go on the Alfea campus, and making even more friends in the process. It was thanks to Tecna... Who would say, it was thanks to her own efforts, but it had been Tecna who had put the idea in her head. She had grown closer to Tecna than any of the other girls that year, and had even had what would have been an awkward confession with any other girl.

"Tecna, I think I like you."

Tecna looked up from her book, a look of curiosity on her face. "You- Oh, do you mean like as in more than like? I can't keep up with your slang sometimes, and-"

"Yes. I love you, kind of. As in I wish you were my girlfriend."

"Yes, like that is what I suspected. Well, it's not surprising, seeing as from what you've told me you've been more emotionally close to me than any other person in these past few years."

"It's kind of weird, huh?" Musa had said calmly, seeing no way that the logical Tecna could hurt her, even with rejection.

"It is out of the ordinary, yes," Tecna said. "But you know, it's also worth thinking about."

"Really?" Musa had said.

"We don't want to jump into anything. We're only in our first of five years at Alfea. Since I have a female form, and you're a female, some on campus might think we're strange and chastise us. Not to mention your royal status could spread the rumors farther than here. It could be worth it, but there's no reason to stir up all that if it's just a passing fancy, yes?"

"Uh, yeah," Musa somewhat agreed. "But it won't matter unless we want it to, right? And I really-"

"Really haven't experienced love," Tecna interrupted. "It's okay to look around. What's the name of that boy you have a little crush on?"

"Riven. But it's not like that with him like it is with you. I barely know the guy, I just think he's a little cute."

"Well, why don't we both just see what it's like, this dating thing, and then, give it time, and in a year, maybe two or more, if you still want to, we'll continue this conversation from the start."

"Okay," Musa had agreed then.

But now there was no more time. Stupid Tecna, with all her planning, why couldn't she see that things could be cut short in just an instant? Musa thought this as she clenched her fist.

No, now she was getting angry at someone who would never be around. A waste of energy, Tecna might say. As Musa stood, gloomily thinking outside the door to their dorm, the other three suite mates entered.

"Musa, are you-"

No, don't say it, Musa thought, knowing exactly what Bloom was going to say. She never wanted to hear someone ask her if she was alright, not ever again. It had been obvious after her mother had died that things weren't alright, but people still asked it. So stupid. Now it was happening again, and she didn't want to hear it. "Sorry, Bloom. Why don't you guys tell Layla I'm sorry, too," Musa said, then opened the door to her dorm, quickly closing it before the question could be continued.

Inside, she froze as she looked around. The room was still full of Tecna's many pieces of beloved electronic equipment. Of course, nothing would have been removed already. Psychologically, Musa accepted the fact that Tecna was gone, and wouldn't ever be found again. But here, seeing the blinking lights and shining metal that she had come to associate with her friend, Musa felt a nostalgic feeling for what she'd lost, and creeping in, even a little hope. Tears filled her eyes as she fought with that particular feeling. When someone was dead, there was nothing left to hope for regarding them.


End file.
